Ah, the 80's. Depending on who you ask, they were either the pinnacle of awesomeness or they sucked more than a twenty dollar whore on a Friday night. Sure, some real crap came out of the 80's: MTV, Reaganomics, Winger. But there was one thing that totally ruled ass about the 80's: the cartoons. There were multitudes of great cartoons during the 80's. Voltron, Captain N, Dinoriders, He-man... these are cartoon giants that shall never be forgotten. But the greatest cartoon of all was Thundercats. If you were a kid like me during the 80's, you either loved the Thundercats or there was something wrong with your sorry ass. As far as cartoons go, it just didn't get any better than Thundercats. A bad-assed team of talking cat-people who beat the shit out of mutants, aliens, and an evil fucking mummy dude using a combination of cool technology and crazy fighting skills. And the coolest Thundercat of all was Panthro.
Panthro: he's one bad mutha fucka. Panthro was 20 times cooler than any other Thundercat without even having to try. Most of the Thundercats had something they did for the team: Liono was the leader, and he had the sword of omens. Cheetara had cool psychic powers. Tygra... he could, um... drive really well. Hell, even the blind guy had a job working the keyboards back at the Cat's Lair. Panthro had two very important jobs: one, he built all the cool tanks and hovercrafts and planes and whatever the hell else the Thundercats used. That was all him. Without Panthro, the Thundercats would have had to walk everywhere, and you can bet your ass there would be a lot less cool explosions and stuff. Second, Panthro was one hell of a fighter. Sure, Cheetara was fast, and Liono had the sword, but NOBODY got down and dirty in a fight like Panthro. You simply didn't cross him if you knew what was good for you. Not only was he a straight up badass, but he also had one other edge in a fight:
NUNCHUKS that shoot LASERS. Let me say that again: NUNCHUKS that shoot LASERS. Think about it; in an 80's cartoon, what is the coolest hand to hand weapon that somebody could wield? Nunchuks (that's how they were spelled back in the 80's). And what was the coolest thing that somebody could shoot? Lasers. Panthro, being the hip mother fucker that he is, realized this and decided to combine the two. He built tanks and shit for the other Thundercats, but he kept his coolest invention for himself. Not only did his "Battlesticks" (as he called them) shoot lasers, but they could shoot bombs and stuff too. But, I mean... NUNCHUKS that shoot LASERS.
By now I'm sure a lot of you are asking "If Panthro was so fucking cool, then what the hell did they need all those other Thundercats for?" I'm glad you asked. Bottom line: they didn't. Frankly, I think that the show's only flaw was that there were too damn many useless Thundercats clogging up the works. I mean, let's face it; the two little kids never helped the rest of the team. They just flew around on their hoverboards all day until they got captured by the Mutants. Tygra was even more useless. And don't even get me started on all the "new" Thundercats they added after the first few seasons, like Bengali and the blind guy. In a perfect world, Thundercats would have been Panthro, Liono, and Cheetara going around kicking ass with a few appearances by Snarf for comic relief. But when it comes down to it, even Liono and Cheetara couldn't hold a candle to Panthro. Liono was cool because he had the Sword of Omens, but he was also an 8 year old kid in a 25 year old man's body. The guy wasn't really the brightest bulb on the tree. Cheetara was smart and fast, but she couldn't really throw down and kick ass like Panthro could. Panthro was the total package. If he didn't have to carry the rest of the team, he could have taken care of the Mutants in no time, and he would have owned the Lunatacs so badly it wouldn't even be funny (Am I the only one who thought the Lunatacs were fucking stupid? The only ones who even deserved to be on the show were Chilla and MAYBE RedEye. The rest of them were just annoying as hell). The guy was just on a whole different level.
Here Panthro is pictured enjoying a refreshing Badical Extreme Power Drink. I encourage all of you to raise up a toast to Panthro, one of the greatest cartoon legends of all time. And now, as Panthro would say: